If you look inside a woman’s heart
and see how much she cries
you will find secrets,
good friends and lies
but what you’ll see the most
is how hard it is to stay strong
when nothing is right
and everything is wrong.
UPDATE: Things are changing. We may be on the way to mending this marriage. Tuesday, we talked and HUGGED! I am so tired of crying. I took a bold step and joined him in the camper at 2am. I know where I messed up, which was mostly a refusal to talk and decisions made without consideration for his opinions. Ditto for his responses to my insanities. When he came in for coffee on Wednesday he hugged me again. We took Kaylee for a short drive (too smokey & hot to play outdoors, so went down to the Girl Scout Camp for a bit of a walk-around). He held hands with me in the truck, we talked a lot more. We laughed together again…and he kissed me goodbye when he left for work. Yesterday he was talking about his plan to kayak with a friend on Sunday. I said I really miss that in my life…and he said he could load the Malibu 2 (2man)as easily as he can load the Scramlbler (1man) if I want to go…so I’m going, too! I’m so excited, but I don’t want to get my hopes up too much…makes it hurt more when what I want doesn’t come to pass. We talked about planning a group kayak trip in July…and taking Kaylee over to the marina for her first ride on the Malibu 2…
If you’re praying for this relationship to mend, it COULD be working, and I thank you from the bottom of my lil pea-pickin’ heart.